Dear Lab/Shul Community,
I imagine that many of us woke up this morning with big feelings about yesterday’s New York City mayoral election – regardless of where we live or how we voted. To be frank, I’m mostly holding pain as we, yet again, confront a world that is increasingly fractured by extremes.
However, I am also feeling proud, of how, at Lab/Shul, we have chosen a different path as an
“anti-divisivist” community, rooted in compassion, nuance, and courageous conversation.
In practical terms, this means that we stay in the room when things get hard, we honor multiple truths, and we build bridges where others build walls. This approach, grounded in our legacy as descendants of Yisrael – those who wrestle with God – is our sacred practice and, in my opinion, the only way to a peaceful future. This work is grueling, but I am so proud that we continue to co-create a community where unity can exist without uniformity.
WATCH:
Rabbi Amichai’s blessing for the mayoral candidates while en route to NYC from Israel yesterday.
As we navigate how to move forward, I humbly offer a few practices we use when engaging in a challenging dialogue:
- Take deep breaths before engaging and responding.
- Ask a genuine question to understand, not to win.
- Reflect back what you heard so the other person feels seen and understood.
- Use “I” statements instead of “you” statements to lower defensiveness.
- Remember that the relationship matters more than being right.
- Know when to pause. A respectful break is better than a hurtful exchange.
- Stay curious. Curiosity keeps conversation open; certainty closes it.
- Assume good intent even when it’s hard.
- End with appreciation for the conversation – even if you disagree.
Wherever you are finding your feelings today, know that here at Lab/Shul, we are holding space for them, because all of you belongs here.
With gratitude,
Sarah Sokolic
Co-Founder & Executive Director
